Utter Failure

*Sigh*

I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. Really, I shouldn’t when this happens all the time.

Yet…

Every time, every failure to follow through with what I wanted to do, is still like I had a knife twisted in me.

Remember those plans I had two weeks ago? The ones for getting all those notes finished before March, along with a few other (probably) more important things. Remember me saying I gave myself a deadline of two weeks to do them all so I could be back on track for March and try again at the 1K-A-Day challenge?

Well…

I failed. I failed miserably.

What’s the use of giving myself a deadline when I don’t even follow it? I didn’t get one thing done that I wanted to. Not one single thing. It all went up in smoke.

As always.

Sometimes I feel as if the universe just conspires against me. Sometimes I just find myself saying “screw it”, what’s the point of trying when I know I’ll fail anyways. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother to get my hopes up.

Actually, not sometimes. All the time.

I need a new muse… One that actually works…

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